Loneliness: the male perspective

Today is International Men’s day, so a good day to share this video.  I spoke with Mike Tuck about some of the results from the connection survey research, in particular the data relating to men and loneliness.


This is the 6-minute highlights tape!

We discussed the low number of men who took part, male attitudes to mental health issues, Mike’s reflections on the loneliness results, how men may not relate to the word “loneliness”, the necessity of the “masks” men wear at work, removing stigma, the need for role models, encouraging conversations, why men struggle with communication skills, and what might help to improve the situation.

For me, his observation that some men feel “ignored, overlooked, superfluous” is so powerful, and something I hope we can address.

Interested to find out your own loneliness score?

Although the survey used for the latest research is closed, you can still take the questionnaire, and match your loneliness score to the matrix of ideas and questions for reflection.

Feeling lonely or would like to improve your communication skills?

Sometimes it can be helpful to speak to someone other than those you already know, about what you are thinking and feeling, including if you feel lonely.

In the video, we discussed how difficult it can be to share how you feel with those close to you, if you haven’t learned the skill, and many grew up with few or no role models to learn from.  Do you relate to that?  Counselling can help you understand how you feel and how to communicate those feelings.  Initially this is in the non-judgmental, confidential counselling appointments, and with time this will then extend into your other relationships.


You have a choice of types of appointment.  Some people like the anonymity of telephone counselling (it’s cheaper too), others prefer to be seen (video or in-person).  It really is up to you, neither is right or wrong.

You also don’t have to come every week.  For some people every week is too much (financially and / or emotionally).  I have some clients come fortnightly, once a month in some cases, as that’s all they can manage.  And that’s ok.

You can have a look at the types of appointment I offer, and I list my prices too.

I do offer a free, no-obligation, 10-minute consultation, so you can see what it might be like before committing further.


I’m not going to lie, going to therapy for the first time is usually terrifying, and once you start there’s no going back!  But once you find the courage to take the first step, and find a therapist you get on with, you’ll be glad you did.

I hope to meet you soon.

Thank you to Mike for taking part. 

For the full 46-minute version of the conversation: https://youtu.be/BHDnSv_Vt-U 

Mike and Michelle talking about men and loneliness